Wednesday 12 September 2012

Olympics and Eugenics










Remember that embarrassing BBC moment?

SETTING: 
BBC studio, Olympic stadium.

CUT TO:
John Inverdale and pundits, straight after a heavy-duty clip about eugenics, Darwin and the Holocaust.

JOHN INVERDALE (nervously)
Look.. er… you know, the fact is that, of the last fifty years of Olympic men's basketball finals, every one of the players has been.. you know… er… How do I say this?… Tall

COLIN JACKSON
It's true. I did a documentary.

DENISE LEWIS
Could it be the weather? The weather's better up there.

JOHN INVERDALE
I mean, put it ilke this, are we getting to the point now where, you know, a short guy, who might show some promise, just holds his hands up and says, 'I'm not going to bother'?

Much shrugging all round.

MICHAEL JOHNSON
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. Let's put this in perspective. Height is just part of the tools. Nobody got anywhere without hard work.

JOHN INVERDALE
So, you're saying, a midget, who was prepared to knuckle down and train, could still be an Olympic basketball champion?

MICHAEL JOHNSON
Possibly.

SPECIAL GUEST, VERNE TROYER
Yay motherfucker.